time.

Infertile talk: so-so
Baby talk: A bit explosive
Bitchy talk: Kindda explosive
this is gonna be short.

i have been extremely busy. too busy to even take a pee or poo. i do it when he's asleep, which is rare cuz he's on a sleep strike.

there's so much to tell.

first up, T is turning 1 this March. Yes, O.N.E. How fast, eh?! I love him with my whole heart and soul that it hurts. When he's on the boob, I hug him tight, smell his hair, caress his face and stroke his hair. And then, finally, he sleeps on the boob (I know people say it is a bad habit - not good to let him sleep on the boob. But, ah, who fucking cares?! He's only this small, cute and needy for this short of time! Sometimes, I get annoyed when people say, U KNOW, YOU SHOULDN'T DO THIS YOU SHOULDN'T DO THAT..*all baby bloody experts* BLAH BLAH BLAH! BLAH! And then I sing a song in my head - you are fucking annoying, neh neh ni noo nooo)...Ok, so I digress.

And I give him a kiss on his head and whisper in his ear, OF ALL THE BILLIONS & SQUILLIONS OF LITTLE BUNNIES AROUND THE WORLD, HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY TO HAVE THE BEST ONE? SLEEP TIGHT MY LITTLE SNUGGLE BUNNY. I LOVE YOU. and off I go...to pee or poo. ha!

i love him so much that it hurts (I know I'm repeating myself). My infertility feelings are still there. Sometimes I get emotional when I think about it. I don't get all upset as I used to when I hear somebody getting pregnant. But there is still a bit of that tug. That pull. That "argh, you martha-farkin-biatch" feeling when I hear, OH IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. Yeah, get your martha-farkin tubes tied, my friend. But I smile politely, of farkin course and whimper a "congrats".

I'm unsure when my next post will be but I'll try when time permits.

So, hmmm..what's next for us?
I think we'll be talking about number deux soon.

Only time will tell.

But for now, I want time to stay still. This short precious time that I have with him is so picturesque that I want to capture every moment in my heart and soul as I hold my T in my arms, smell his hair and whisper, I LOVE YOU, MY SNUGGLE BUNNY.