do we try again?

Our fertility specialist has given us the go ahead to try for another baby after the 2nd month of my period. Well, 2nd month has come and gone. We haven't really been talking about trying again. T still touches my tummy daily to ask for his "bay-bee" and it doesn't hit me in the guts anymore when he says that. It's a numb sadness that I feel.

But sometimes there's just that, WHAT IF WE DON'T QUICKLY TRY NOW OR IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN? fear that I feel from my infertility days.I know I am very blessed to have T but I also know that I do want another one, for T's sake. Somehow I feel that we'll be here in Australia for good so I would like a sibling for T. Somebody he can count on, somebody he can go to for help or support if anything should happen to both babes and myself since he doesn't have any other family members to depend on. Plus I grew up as an only child and it was pretty lonely.

But my heart's not ready but the practical side of me says that I should try sooner rather than later.

I just wish it didn't have to be so difficult.

Times like these I just wish that the beauty of conception be that simple for us.








I just wish that I'm fertile.